Lost: Alternate Ending To Season 3 Finale

As I reflect on season 3 of Lost, I'm reminded of how unnatural some of the characters act. If you were Jack, would you feel the need to blow up a tree in order to illustrate how dynamite can be used as an explosive? I think that most people would be pretty clear on the concept without a demonstration. And if you were Sun when she was setting the stakes for the ping pong game, would you make Sawyer only give up nicknames for a week? Why not forever?

I notice these things all the time, but unlike many viewers, I'm OK with them. Jack had to blow up the tree because we hadn't seen any action for a while. Sawyer only had to go for a week without nicknames because he's nothing without them (although my favorite line of his, "look who's hooked on phonics," didn't involve a nickname). But I couldn't help thinking that the end of the season 3 finale may have been a bit of a stretch. Here's how it might have gone down in the real world:

LOCKE: (Pointing his gun at Naomi) Naomi, put the phone down.

NAOMI: OK, I will comply because I value my life. Thank you for not just throwing a knife at me when I wasn't looking. This way, you get to interrogate me.

JACK: Locke, what are you doing? She's calling her boat so we can get off the island.

LOCKE: Yes Jack, I see how my behavior might seem perplexing. However, I have recently discovered that Naomi is indeed a representative of the bad guys, and it is not in our best interests to call her boat. Since we're on the same team, I will gladly share the complete details.

JACK: That's a good idea. I've always felt that we've needed to work on our communication. I also think we need to take advantage of the untapped resources at our disposal.

LOCKE: Such as?

JACK: Well, Alex for example. She must know almost everything Ben does, and she's on our side. I don't know why we never thought to ask her any questions.

ALEX: That's a good point. I can clear up all of the island's mysteries for you in about five minutes. I can have you on a boat back to civilization later today.

BEN: Don't listen to her! This is THE BEGINNING OF THE END!

LOCKE: Ben, we already know you don't respond to torture, so I'll give you one more chance to tell us everything, or I'm going to kill you.

BEN: Jacob won't let me tell you.

LOCKE: [Bang bang bang]

Now that's more realistic, but where's all the fun?